Dating world as a practicing christian.

Sooo, dating as a practicing christian (beginner) has been one of the most hectic yet peaceful journeys of my life. Before I encountered christianity I was very drawn towards worldly things and worldly emotions..

Lets take a dive into my past real quick, sorry if I trauma dump, then again it is my blog..

My biggest struggle was idolization of men and wanting to constantly be in control.

Since I idolized men the talking stage would be a literal hell. I was always boy crazy and would dream of meeting the love of my life, if he even existed. With this naive mindset every time I would receive the slightest bit of attention from men I was immediately enamored, Id start thinking of what our kids would look like and seeing if their last name clicked with my first name, taking this all into account when things went south with a guy i'd be talking to, my whole world would crumble, I would do anything for that person to stay with me. The amount of times I let someone degrade me in order to not feel lonely is truly abysmal. With many months which inevitably became years of trials and errors with men I was confronted with this question, do I love a man more than I love myself?? looking back it truly looked like it, thank goodness aging also comes with the ripening of maturity. In this maturity I found that feeling lonely and being alone are two different things, and that a human would never give me the completion I was so desperately in seek of. That completion personally is something I have found in God. Surprisingly my romance life is what lead me to my life praising God. When I started practicing christianity I learned that idolizing a human or anything in general of this world would just strain you of the potential relationship you could have with God. I also learned that as a christian it's important to find someone who is "equally yolked", for non-christians reading this means someone who believes and loves Christ as much as you do, but lets be for real the amount of eligible christian bachelors are scarce, and the ones i've met all give off Nevel Papperman from Icarly vibes, and who wants that?? It's not just about a man being christian but its also about me being attracted to them, my best friend who is also christian says that when God brings a man into your life it'll be everything you're looking for.. but as you've figured out that mystery man is yet to be discovered. And since I am a control freak and somewhat impatient I have been meeting worldly men and contemplating whether they are worth my time but they never are, because at the end of the day my best friend is right, I have to be patient.